6 Truths About Relationships That Everyone Should Know

6 Truths About Relationships That Everyone Should Know

For 28 Years, I’ve Asked My Husband for This One Small Thing

Care and Feeding is Slate’s parenting advice column. Have a question for Care and Feeding? Submit it here or post it in the Slate Parenting Facebook group. I have been married for 28 years to an easygoing guy. His family lives a good eight hours away. I am happy to have them come visit but have asked over and over again that they schedule their visits with us when we can make sure we have time to spend with them, but they always end up calling my husband and telling him when they are coming. We usually get only a few days or a week’s notice. My husband is a firefighter and owns his own business as well, so unless he’s able to plan ahead, I am stuck entertaining, cooking, and cleaning for them. I have asked my husband to talk to me before he agrees to these visits, but he makes me feel like I am being unreasonable or mean to want to have a better plan in place. I’m just frustrated and don’t know how to get him to stand up for me for once and ask them to stay in a hotel unless they plan their visits for when he is also available. Am I asking too much? Also, some of the family members are extremely rude, sexist, and racially insensitive while at our house to the point where my college-age daughter, who still lives with us, won’t stay at home if they come. How can I get my husband to understand that he needs to set some boundaries and parameters of guest behavior with them?

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6 Truths About Relationships That Everyone Should Know

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